Hello my fellow Boddhisattvas,

There's something inside my heart which has been bothering me and I am literally praying and chanting and reading and looking for answers within myself to this question and for signs which will tell me or direct me towards the answer.

I have been practicing this beautiful philosophy for almost 2 years now. I am a 28YO girl from India living in Paris. My parents wants me to take my life decision according to them but that's completely opposite of what I want. If I dont listen to them or take my life-decisions for myself it's a do or die situation. I will lose them and if I do listen to them I will lose myself.

(They want me to get married to a guy from my community and come back to India but I have found someone wonderful in my life which according to the Kosen Rufu Partner definitions fulfills all the factors. I see him as my Kosen Rufu life partner and to marry him but my parents do not agree for this) 

This has really put me in a serious situation I always chant and pray to convince them for this marriage and pray for their happiness in my happiness. Even after they have said that it is impossible for them to agree for it, I believe it will happen but at the moment I am completely lost and need some inspiration. 

Am I wrong to think of my own life and happiness?

I request you to please guide me.


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Hi parental expectations are just That! Your happiness and determinationation is what is important! Arranged marriage are an outdated practice! They will accept your decision when it is made! It will just take some time!! All the best you are absolutely right to follow your heart!1 No one knows what is best for your life except you! Keep up your Diamoku keep chanting about this !! They will come around!!

Thank you David for your kind and supporting message.

I keep chanting for their approval and also for their ultimate happiness which I think is in my absolute happiness. But currently I have been very tense about their health as they are in depression and talks about going someone where they dont have to answer someone and say that I have disappointed them as a daughter because I said I would come back to India and get married according to the societal norms and I am not keeping my words. My siblings also feel the same way about me.

Hearing all of this makes me want to change their life condition and improve my relationship with them. I really want to touch their lives with Daimoku. I am determined to see them happy in my happiness. Because I believe love is above all the difference and I know my parents love me a lot.


Marry who you love and chant for your parents happiness.


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