This Worldwide Community is not an official SGI site
This is my very first post here and I'm very happy to have found this place.
I just discovered SGI buddhism recently and I've been reading and listening about it as much as possible, but there are questions that arise in me that I have no one to ask them to.
Due to COVID, my local community is not holding any meetings at the moment, so I haven't been able to experience one or get to know anyone. I hope to be able to find some kind of community here and also be able to solve some questions.
My main issue right now is... I would love to try out the practice and to chant, but whenever I think about it, I become insecure. I live with my family, and I feel 'ashamed' and uncomfortable with the idea of chanting while they are at home and they can hear me. I guess I haven't had the chance to even feel comfortable with chanting myself, so it requires courage I do not possess right now.
Nevertheless, whenever I try to make it fit so I can chant when they are not home (which usually would mean I'd never be able to chant.... there is always someone) I feel awful, because I think I should be brave enough to embrace my journey as I want to try something new out.
In any case, for one reason or another, it turns out that I cannot chant because I feel uncomfortable, uneasy and very easily distracted.
I have tried chanting in my car (while parked), but it feels awful having to "hide" like this, nor does it feel comfortable or like a valuable setting, so that doesn't work either.
Does anyone have any tips?